Pants On Fire

Sky diver, your pants are on fire and the rest of your clothes is blowing 
And for some strange reason, your nose is growing 
My skin is crawling, everybody's chin is falling, 
jaws are dropping left and right 
Lost cause you came like a thief in the night 
With nice white teeth and a tight ass and long conversation 
Fascinating feeling to spend months in your company 
I never felt uncomfortable, even with my clothes off 
Chillin so hard, my ass almost froze off 
Everybody shows off and wants to look presentable 
But the fact of the matter is that accidents are preventable 
From the sound of the candy wrappers 
Down to the handicappers 
Everybody's got to exercise a little caution 
But every so often expect things to get hectic or 
Technically difficult and I begin to get skeptical 
Especially when the canadian bacon gets sizzlin 
Isn't it a sin when the ceiling is invisible 
We need new inventions that reveal peoples true intentions 
A portable pride protector, affordable lie detector 
The wild lifestyle has the tendency to intimidate 
But it isn't your invitation to imitate 
In front of my face, you spoke my gospel like an apostle 
But on the other side of town, you got coke in your nostril 
Just for example, we all want to live a bit 
Whatever, it's your body of water, why should I give a shit 

Who are you anyway, and where did you come from 
Dumdum, just when I thought I could trust someone 
The mask comes off, and your face fades away 
You radiate eighty-eight full shades of gray 

Black and white rainbow, you know you ain't acting right 
Game show hostess, stabbing every back in sight 
The time has come thicker than blood 
And make no mistake, I'm a stick in the mud 
I'm a kick in your pants and I'm a lump in your throat 
And I'm the hassle in your castle, I'm going to jump in your moat 
Splash, hypocritical condition the hospital 
Makes this mission impossible 
Pretty much, I've got no patients left and as a physician or doctor 
It puts me in an awkward position 
No magician can trick me, or lick me with a cattle whip 
So what makes you think you can sink my battleship 
We ain't family, drama queen, the camera's rolling 
Show me your swollen memories before the moment's stolen 
Slow-motion Picasso, wearing the wool socks 
And coming with the full clip, I'm sick of this bullshit 

Who are you anyway, and where did you come from 
Dumdum, just when I thought I could trust someone 
The mask comes off, and your face fades away 
You radiate eighty-eight full shades of gray